You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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