it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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