we're blogging at a bar
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
