I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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