Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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