whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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