And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
