I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
