she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
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