I'm in love with you.
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same