I looked at my own cervix.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
