I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
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