sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Randomize
