Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
