Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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