Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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