I heard we made out
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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