I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize