I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
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drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
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Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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