he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
