some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize