can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
This is the high leading the old right now
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.