wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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