Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
