why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
