I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
