Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
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