It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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