My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize