sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
