so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
