I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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