I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Randomize
