are you still at the devil's house?
I wish I only lived at night.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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