Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'm too high and old for this...
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
