Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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