You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Randomize
