i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
How does it feel to date your dad?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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