I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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