can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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