TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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