you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
The air was thick with penises
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize