too bad you live with your parents still
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize