I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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