whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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