4 words: hood of his car
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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