are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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