I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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