I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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