Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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