But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
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did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
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Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
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